Saturday, June 26, 2010
It's amazing how much can happen in the course of a second, minute, or hour. Yet, when I think about all that changes over the course of a month or year, my mind boggles and I can't help but to think about what is yet to come.
Unfortunately, it has never been easy for me to just roll with the punches. I constantly want the answers to every question in my mind. I guess (I'll never admit that I know) that's why change is so stinkin' hard for me.
A little over a month ago I was all set to attend Ashland University in the fall. I had made the dance team, I had a room mate all lined up (I LOVE YOU ERIKA !!! ), and I was going to be 50 minutes away from my mother-- what more could I ask for? Yet, I will never forget opening up the piece of mail that would change my college experience forever.
It's amazing how much money can change plans. Marietta College offered me $10,000 more than Ashland could. And, when I took the financial argument to Ashland's financial aid department, they admitted that they could not compete with the offer.
Did I mention that I HATE change? Did I mention that my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years, and my best friend both go to Marietta? Yeah, there's change for you; Did I mention that I HATE change?
I lingered on the decision for days. Okay, weeks. I kept asking for extensions, for more time to allow my mind to sit on the pro's and con's list that I had formed in my head. The biggest surprise to most people was that my boyfriend/best friend combo actually fell onto my con's list. If you know me, you know that I like to be an individual and have individual life experiences. If you don't know me, you just learned a fun fact.
I was sitting at my desk, financial aid packages scattered out in front of me, phone in hand, texting my mom. I was complaining that I hate decision making. If I remember correctly, she was reassuring me, in the nicest way possible, that money was a humongous factor in this decision. My next text back to her was "I am a Marietta Pioneer!"
WHAT! I made a decision? How? My fingers moved and my mind hadn't caught up to them yet.
I'm alive. No decision that I have made thus far in the whole transferring process has killed me. I still have feeling in all of my limbs and I can still get out of bed in the morning without an ounce of regret. I know that Marietta is the place for me and there is no doubt in my mind that I will thrive there. Sometimes, time tells all. My fingers moved because they knew what my heart wanted.
If I've learned anything from this whole process it's that life goes on. Will it change the way that I make decisions in the future? Probably not--that's just who I am.
"If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."